11 year old's science exams|
Posted by Tommy on January 14, 1998 at 19:15:42:
The following are all quotes from an 11 year old's science exams:
1) When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire.
2) H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.
3) To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test
4) When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide.
5) Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free
6) Water is composed of 2 gins, Oxygin & Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure
7) Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillers.
8) Blood flows down one leg and up the other.
9) Respiration is composed of 2 acts, first inspiration, and then
10) The moon is a planet just like earth, only it is even deader.
11) Artifical insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow
12) Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and
13) A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can
14) Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like
15) The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the borax and the
16) The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.
17) The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana.
18) The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out
19) A permanent set of teeth consists of 8 canines, 8 cuspids, 2
20) The tides are a fight between the Earth and Moon. All water tends
21) A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct
22) Many women believe that an alcoholic binge will have no ill
23) Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa.
24) Germinate: To become a naturalized German.
25) Liter: A nest of young puppies.
26) Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat.
27) Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.
28) Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky.
29) Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot.
30) Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.
31) Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is
32) To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.
33) For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the
34) For drowning: Climb on top of the person and move up and down
35) For fainting: Rub the person's chest, or if a lady, rub her arm
36) For dog bite: Put the dog away for sevral days. If he has not
37) For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient
38) To prevent contraception: wear a condominium.
39) For head cold: Use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in
40) To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow.