1. Udurawana & two friends talking in the pub. The friends are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while Udurawana remains quiet.
After a while one of the first two turns to Udurawana and says, "Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?"
Udurawana says "I'll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees."
The Friends were amazed. "What happened then?" they asked.
"She said, 'get out from under the bed and fight like a man'."
2. Udurawana bought a new mobile.
He called everyone from his Phone Book & said "My Mobile No. has changed. Earlier it was Nokia 3310 Now it is 6610"
3. Udurawana : I am a Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend : Really, what is he studying.
Udurawana : No he is not studying, They r Studying him.
4. Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Udurawana: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ....
Interviewer shouts: Stop it.
Udurawana : Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...
5. Udurawana and neighbor were sitting on a tree and Udurawana was singing a song.
After 4 songs Udurawana hung himself upside down and started singing again.
Neighbor asks, "Udurawana, what is the matter with you? Why are you hanging upside down".
Udurawana says "I am singing the B side."
6. Udurawana : Doctor, In my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
Udurawana : Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.
7. Udurawana : If I die will u remarry?
Wife : No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
Udurawana : No, I'll also stay with your sister
8. Udurawana : People consider me as a "GOD"
Wife : How do you know??
Udurawana : When I went to the Park today, everybody said, Oh GOD ! U have came again..
9. Udurawana complained 2 Police : Sir all items are missing, except the TV in my house.
Police : How the thief did not take TV???
Udurawana : I was watching TV na....