Laughter is still the best medicine!
Posted by H.P.R.Gunawardena on March 06, 2008 at 17:33:46

LESSON 1
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting.
On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp.
They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says :
" Normally, one is granted three wishes, but as you are three, I will allow one wish each. "
So the eager senior manager shouted : " I want the first wish.
I want to be in the Bahamas , on a fast boat and have no worries."
Pfufffff . and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted :
" I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails. "
Pfufffff . And he was also gone.
The boss calmly said : " I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.30 pm . "
MORAL OF THE STORY : ALWAYS LET THE BOSS SPEAK FIRST

LESSON 2
Standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand," Listen," said the CEO, " this is a very sensitive and important document,and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"
" Certainly," said the young executive.
He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
" Excellent, excellent! " said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder machine.
" I just need one copy. "
LESSON # 2 : NEVER, NEVER ASSUME THAT YOUR BOSS KNOWS EVERYTHING

LESSON 3
An American and a Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA When the American turned to the Japanese and asked " What kind of -ese are you ? "
The Japanese, confused, replied : " Sorry, but I don't understand what you mean.. "
The American repeated : " What kind of -ese are you ? "
Again, the Japanese was confused over the question.
The American, now irritated, then yelled : " What kind of -ese are you... Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese !, etc......??? "
The Japanese then replied : " Oh, I am a Japanese. "
A while later the Japanese turned to the American and asked what kind of 'key' was he.
The American, frustrated, yelled : " What do you mean what kind of -kee' am I ?! "
The Japanese said, " Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee ? "
LESSON No 3 : NEVER INSULT ANYONE

LESSON 4
There were these 4 guys - a Russian, a German, an American and a French,who together found this small genie bottle.
When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared.
Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle, he said :
" Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish.When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become,
then your wish will come true. "
The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted : " Wine ! "
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine.The Frenchman was very happy, swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn.He did the same and shouted : " Vodka ! " and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted : " Beer ! " He was likewise very contented with his beer-filled pool.
The last is the American.
He was running towards the pool when suddenly he steps on a banana peel.He slipped towards the pool and shouted, " Shit !!!!!!!..... ...."
LESSON # 4 : ALWAYS THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING, BECAUSE SOMETIMES ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN !


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