Posted by Surashmin on October 28, 1999 at 12:17:06:
Who said children are getting dumber every year?
Check out the wisecracks below and judge for
yourselves:
TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday?
STUDENT: Seven.
TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday?
STUDENT: Nine.
TEACHER: That's impossible.
STUDENT: No, it isn't, Teacher. I'm eight today.
TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North
America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered
America?
CLASS: George!
TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing we have
today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
WILLY: Me!
TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you
are.
TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
SYLVIA: Your name on this report card.
TEACHER: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake.
SAMMY: You can't fool me, Teacher... snakes don't
have feet.
TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by
biting
insects?
JOSE: Don't bite any.
TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with
"I".
ELLEN: I is...
TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the
alphabet."
MOTHER: Why on earth did you swallow the money I
gave you?
JUNIOR: You said it was my lunch money.
TEACHER: If I had seven oranges in one hand and
eight oranges
in the other, what would I have?
CLASS COMEDIAN: Big hands!
=======================================================
Quick Wit:
Men do not like to admit to even momentary
imperfection. My
husband forgot the code to turn off the alarm. When
the police
came, he wouldn't admit he'd forgotten the code...he
turned
himself in.
My mom said she learned how to swim when someone
took her out
in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said,
'Mom, they
weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'
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