Law Jokes
Posted by Chantelle on December 16, 1998 at 02:00:29:

> -- From a little book called "Disorder in the Court." They're things
> people actually said in court, word for word.
> Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that
> morning?
> A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
> Q: And why did that upset you?
> A: My name is Susan.
> Q: What is your date of birth?
> A: July fifteenth.
> Q: What year?
> A: Every year.
> Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
> A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
> Q: This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?
> A: Yes.
> Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
> A: I forget.
> Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've
> forgotten?
> Q: How old is your son -- the one living with you.
> A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
> Q: How long has he lived with you?
> A: Forty-five years.
> Q: And where was the location of the accident?
> A: Approximately milepost 199.
> Q: And where is milepost 199?
> A: Probably between milepost 198 and 200.
> Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
> A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
> Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
> A: After the accident?
> Q: Before the accident.
> A: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.
> Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo or
> a cult?
> A: We both do.
> Q: Voodoo?
> A: We do.
> Q: You do?
> A: Yes, voodoo.
> Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue
> lights flashing?
> A: Yes.
> Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
> A: Yes, sir.
> Q: What did she say?
> A: What disco am I at?

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