1) 3 wishes
Bob and Sam (both were 15) waiting for their school bus in the morning were chatting when Bob said "Last night i was in my bed when a ghost came into my room and told me i had 3 wishes." Sam in disbelief said what did you wish for." Then Bob said " Last night i screwed your mom your girlfriend and your sister."
2) one for the ladies
MEN ARE ALWAYS WHINING ABOUT HOW WOMEN ARE SUFFOCATING THEM. PERSONALLY I THINK IF YOU CANE HEAR THE WHINING YOURE NOT PRESSING ON THE PILLOW HARD ENOUGH.