The Computer
Posted by Tommy on March 19, 1997 at 19:52:13:

Todd complained to his friend, "My elbow really hurts. I guess I should
see a doctor." His friend offered, "Don't do that!!! There's a computer at
the drug store that can diagnose anything, quicker and cheaper than a
doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will
diagnose your problem and tell you what yoy can do about it only costs
Todd figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine
sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the
sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making noises and
the various lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a
small slip of paper on which was printed:
You have Tennis Elbow
Soak your arm in warm water
Avoid heavy labor
It will be better in two weeks

Late that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and
how it would change medical science forever he began to wonder if this
machine could be fooled. He decided to give it a try. He mixed together
some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and some urine samples from
his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction.
He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample
and deposited $10.00. The machine again made the usual noise and printed
out the following:
Your tap water is too hard -- Get a water softner
Your dog has worms __ Give him vitamins
Your daughter's on drugs __ Put her in rehab
Your wife is pregnant __ It ain't yours__ get a lawyer
And if you don't stop jerking off,
your elbow will never get better

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