The Cow
Posted by Tommy on March 19, 1997 at 19:37:10:

On a farm out in the country lived a man and a woman and their
three sons. Early one morning, the woman awoke, and while looking
out of the window onto to the pasture, she saw that the family's
only cow was lying dead in the field. The situation looked
hopeless to her-how could she possibly continue to feed her
family now?

In a depressed state of mind, she hung herself. When the man awoke
to find his wife dead, as well as the cow, he too began to see the
hopelessness of the situation, and he shot himself in the head.

Now the oldest son woke up to discover his parents dead (and the
cow!), and he decided to go down to the river and drown himself.
When he got to the river, he discovered a mermaid sitting on the
bank. She said, "I've seen all and know the reason for your
despair. But if you will have sex with me five times in a row, I
will restore your parents and the cow to you." The son agreed to
try, but after four times, he was simply unable to satisfy her
again. So the mermaid drowned him in the river.

Next the second oldest son woke up. After discovering what had
happened, he too decided to throw himself into the river. The
mermaid said to him, "If you will have sex with me ten times in a
row, I will make everything right." And while the son tried his
best (seven times!), it was not enough to satisfy the mermaid, so
she drowned him in the river.

the youngest son woke up and saw his parents dead, the dead cow in
the field, and his brothers gone. He decided that life was a
hopeless prospect, and he went down to the river to throw himself
in. And there he also met the mermaid.

"I have seen all that has happened, and I can make everything right
if you will only have sex with me fifteen times in a row." The
young son replied, "Is that all? Why not twenty times in a row?"
The mermaid was somewhat taken aback by this request. Then he said,
"Hell, why not twenty-five times in a row?" And even as she was
reluctantly agreeing to his request, he said, "Why not THIRTY times
in a row?"

Finally, she said, "Enough!! Okay, if you will have sex with me
thirty times in a row, then I will bring everybody back to perfect

Then the young son asked, "Wait! How do I know that thirty times
in a row won't kill you like it did the cow?"

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