Cat Food
Posted by Bal Vallah on July 30, 1998 at 01:15:23:

This woman has her bridge club every Thursday night and after a peaceful game or two with the ladies,
she goes home to fix her husband dinner when he gets home from work. Well, one Thursday, she's
playing a great game and she has an incredible hand when she notices the time. "Oh, no! I have to go
fix my husband his dinner! He's going to be so angry if it's not ready on time." And she dashes out
of her friend's house, her great hand forgotten on the table.

When she gets home, she realizes she has very little time, not enough time to go to the supermarket,
and all she has in the cupboard is a wilted lettuce leaf, an egg, and a can of cat food. In a panic,
she opens the can of cat food, stirs in the egg, and garnishes it with the lettuce leaf just as her
husband is pulling up. She watches in horror as he sits down to his dinner, and then she realizes he
is loving it!

"Mmmm, darling, this is the best dinner you have made for me in forty years of marriage. You can make
this for me any old day, mmmmm!" And that night they had sex for the first time in months and it was

Needless to say, every Thursday from then on, she made this dinner for her husband. She tells her
bridge cronies about it and they are all horrified.

"You're going to kill him," they say, or "He's just yanking your chain," but she continued to make
him his cat food dinner and then, afterwards, they would bonk like fiends.

Two months later, her husband died and all the bridge women the Thursday after the funeral attacked
our new widow for being so callous. "You killed him!

We told you that feeding him that cat food every week would do him in! How can you just sit there so
calmly and play bridge knowing you murdered your husband?"

The wife stoically replied, "Ahh, I didn't kill him. He fell off the mantel when he was licking his

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